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  • avatar

    What Popular School Reform Initiatives Are Missing Shouldn't Be Surprising

    posted in Character Blog at 3:01 pm on April 28, 2011 | 0 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Ed Reform, , School Reform, Singapore

    Post by Kyle Baker, Program Coordinator at the Institute for Excellence & Ethics

    This morning Valerie Strauss posted an article for the Washington Post’s Answer Sheet pointing out some of what she labeled as the more “surprising” elements of Singapore’s “Desired Outcomes of Education”.

    (As a little background…Singapore, along with a number of other East Asian and Scandinavian countries, consistently outperform US schools on just about every achievement-oriented assessment, and are often cited as systems that we need to “catch”.  It should also be noted that I believe Strauss was making the same argument I’m about to, which is that if we were to take a moment to think rationally, then these desired outcomes wouldn’t actually seem too surprising at all).

    You can read her article here and see the full list of desired outcomes on the Singapore Ministry of Education’s website  here, and I’d encourage you to do both, but for quick reference, check out the table they use to show desired outcomes by stage:

    (graphic via http://www.moe.gov.sg/education/desired-outcomes/)

    Strauss compares a recent statement from US President Barack Obama (“The goal for America’s educational system is clear: Every student should graduate from high school ready for college and a career.  Every student should have meaningful opportunities to choose from upon graduating from high school.”) and the outcomes identified by the Singapore Ministry of Education, stating that “…because the school system is so often compared favorably to ours, it is fair to look at what kind of graduates the government of Singapore says it wants the public school system to produce.”

    TRUTH.

    Particularly because according to research from virtually every field, these outcomes have a lot to do with the golden rings that have been identified: creativity, innovation…and let’s be honest…a productive, efficient, reliable labor force that can fuel the national economy and build a stronger global community.

    For a brief journey into just one of these fields, neuroscience, take a good look at some of the evidence presented in Dr. Edward M. Hallowell’s recent book,  Shine:  Using Brain Science to Get the Best from Your People.  In Shine, Hallowell cites neurological research (as well as additional research in psychology, sociology, and more) explaining what exactly is needed for a person to reach “peak performance.”  Hallowell identifies Select, Connect, Play, Grapple and Grow, and Shine as his 5-step “Cycle of Excellence.”

    Hallowell’s book, similar to the work done by Csikszmentmihalyi, Gilbert, Duckworth, Dweck, Pink, Johnson, Christakis, Fowler, (who are all cited in Shine…and the work done by IEE), points out something that by now shouldn’t be surprising:  People who are healthy, happy, connected, and motivated in healthy ways (both intrinsically and extrinsically) are BETTER.

    They’re better learners.

    They’re better teachers.

    They’re better police officers.

    They’re better accountants.

    They’re better managers.

    Should I continue?  Ok, I will…

    They’re better parents.

    They’re better community members.

    They’re better waiters and waitresses.

    They’re better pilots.

    They’re better friends.

    They’re better stock brokers.

    They’re better insurance agents.

    Picking up on the pattern here?

    Turns out that things like self-efficacy, treating others with respect, conscience, integrity, thinking critically and expressing yourself confidently, communication skills, and the ability to creatively solve complex problems….REALLY MATTER.  If you’re not sure how all of this translates into the day to day life of students and teachers in a classroom setting, check out work on emotional intelligence, resilient schools & classrooms, etc.

    These things matter in the home, the community, and the workplace, and they matter in schools too, even when objectives like “passing state tests”, “reaching curriculum standards,” and “getting better grades” are identified as priorities.  Just like the skills above lead to higher motivation, productivity, and satisfaction in the workplace, they lead to higher academic performance and safe & supportive classrooms and schools as well.

    In  her article, Strauss says:

    “The Education Ministry in Singapore talks about educating students to become confident, moral, analytical thinkers who are responsible and involved adult citizens of their country. And it wants kids to grow up with a “zest for life.”

    Maybe I missed it, but I haven’t heard any school reformers here talk about that.”

    With all due respect, I have to point out that yes, Ms. Strauss is actually missing the fact that some school reformers are not only talking about this, but doing real work in schools on these issues right now (and demonstrating significant positive impact as well).

    But I can totally understand the reasons why this fact might be missed.

    Right now the push in the education field, particularly what’s playing out on TV and in newspaper headlines, seems to be  on test scores, teacher performance, workforce preparation, and career readiness.

    However both in and out of schools, many people are starting to recognize that while these elements are definitely important, there is something missing…

    As Strauss point out, it would be wise for school-reformers to take a good look at the objectives that the school systems they admire have set for themselves, because their priorities are fairly clearly stated…and seem to be fairly different from the priorities being focused on here.

    While in far too many cases US school reform priorities may seem misguided, and perhaps some of them are at times, but maybe in other cases it’s just a case of parallels in terminology going unrecognized.  You see, it’s true that we’re not directly working on improving “zest,”  but we are helping thousands of students, teachers, and others work on “living a balanced, purposeful, & healthy life.”  We also help them work on developing positive and productive relationships, communicating & collaborating with efficiency & effectiveness, managing priorities & reducing stress, committing to high standards & continuous improvement, demonstrating emotional intelligence, integrity & responsibility, exhibiting creativity & innovation; critical thinking and problem solving, and leading & serving others.

     

    That sounds pretty zestful to me, even though rather than calling it “Key Stage Outcomes of Education”, we call this “building the culture of excellence & ethics for success in school, work, and beyond.”

    While school reform can often be a polarizing topic, it really isn’t for us, because instead of  just focusing on developing people who are smart or developing people who are good, we focus on both in a highly integrated way…because that’s what research, or as school-reformers like to say, “the data”, tells us to do.

    Sometimes even though people are using different terminology they may still have the same goal in mind, which must be the case here…because in November educators in Singapore are bringing in IEE to train teachers on how to use the Power2Achieve curriculum and the Culture of Excellence & Ethics Assessment in their schools and classrooms.

    Select schools in Kansas, Iowa, New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Colorado, California, Texas, and other places around the country have already been blazing this trail across the US in partnership with IEE.  Hopefully the educational community as a whole won’t be too far behind.

     

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  • avatar

    Instead of asking for/giving feedback, ask for/give feedforward.

    posted in Character Blog at 8:05 am on April 6, 2011 | 0 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , email,

    Post by Kyle Baker, IEE Program Coordinator


    You can sign up for once-a-day emails on virtually any topic these days.  While there is a huge spectrum to choose from, the only one I currently subscribe to is The Startup Daily.  Run by Karl Krantz, these emails arrive each morning Monday-Friday with a dose of goodness from leading organizational leadership and entrepreneurship authors.

    Here’s what’s in today’s edition:

    Instead of Asking for Feedback, Ask for Feedforward

    Feedback is typically focused on the past, and on what someone did wrong. The problem is that most people don’t like to give negative feedback, and even fewer people like to hear negative feedback. Uncomfortable topics—the ones that need the most attention—are either avoided, or the feedback is not heard.

    Ask “What Can I Do Better in the Future?” Not “What Did I Do Wrong in the Past?”

    With “feedforward” people can focus on hearing the suggestions without becoming defensive or worrying about their reply. People respond better to ideas they can still act on, and we are all free to change the future.

    -via What Got You Here Won’t Get You There:  How Successful People Become Even More Successful by Marshall Goldsmith

     

    Like many books you might find in the “Business” section at your local bookstore, these quips and many of the books they are pulled from offer wonderful education-crossover appeal.  The concept of feedforward would be an awesome strategy to incorporate into educational environments (while many educators may already use the strategy itself, the term itself is definitely a “sticky” one).

    When I read these emails each morning, I spend a few moments thinking about them, then try to observe ways that they apply (or don’t) throughout the course of the day. Every single day I find myself reflecting, thinking critically, learning, and growing through doing so.

     

    You can subscribe yourself on The Startup Daily website, and if you’re a Tweeter and/or a Facebooker, you can find The Startup Daily there as well.

     

    (and while we’re on the topic of Twitter and Facebook, don’t forget to follow myself and Matt Davidson on Twitter, and check out the IEE Facebook page too!)

     

     

     

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  • avatar

    Building Intervention Muscles

    posted in Character Blog at 2:22 pm on March 17, 2011 | 0 Permalink | Reply

    Last night I attended a screening of the movie The Stoning of Soraya M, a powerful film adapted from the book La Femme Lapidée by Freidoune Sahebjam, which is based on the true story of Soraya Manutchehri, a 35 year old woman who was stoned to death in Iran in 1986.

    I had seen the film once previously, and both times I was moved by the story and reminded that whether we choose to think about it or not, there are terrible things that occur around the world and as well as in our own backyards on a daily basis.

    Following the showing of the film, there was a brief period for comments and discussions from those in attendance.   I was thankful for those who stood up for their culture and faith tradition and said “what is depicted is not our practice,” as well as for the unifying call to “stop this kind of innocent-bystander behavior in our own lives and around the world,” which emerged early and was echoed throughout the discussion. (I would be lying if I said that every single comment during the discussion was geared toward these positive, accurate, and unifying themes, but the vast majority were, and it was an open-floor commenting format so there was an opportunity to learn from what everyone had to share.).

    Watching the film again and listening to the discussion reminded me of a recent experience.

    A few months ago, I was visiting with a person whose child attends a very “nice” (high academically performing, above average SES, strong athletic/extra-curricular programs, positive perceptions among local public, etc.) high school.  He asked me, “Do you think there are guns in my child’s school?”

    I thought about the question for a moment before answering that I could not comment on if there were guns in the school or not, because I had no information on that topic or situation, but I could assure him 100% that there were extremely dangerous, even deadly weapons that were not only present in the school, but used on a daily basis.

    I then explained to him that while I didn’t know if there were guns or knives, or if there were how many or how often they were brought into the building, what I did know was that bullying, harassment, violent language, demeaning behavior and more occurred every day within the walls of the school (and increasingly, online as well).  I told him that while these weapons may initially seem like a less urgent problem to deal with, these weapons play key factors in the cases of school violence, self-harm, and suicide that we see occur all too often (and on an increasing basis).

    These aren’t easy things to talk about and deal with, just like The Stoning of Soraya M. isn’t an easy film to watch and think about, but last night I continued to see the critical the need to explicitly teach both youth and adults the skills needed to discern right from wrong, to thoughtfully form and stand up for their beliefs, to intentionally shape the culture that we live and work in, and to develop the courage and skills needed to speak up and step in when they see or hear something that isn’t right.

    Through gaining knowledge and learning to use strategies such as those presented in the Culture of Excellence & Ethics Intervention Continuum, which is presented to students in Unit 5.1 of the Power2Achieve Foundations program and Integrity in Action Student Leadership Academies like the one we hosted on February 12th, to educators in our Power2Achieve Toolkit/Academy 5.1 workshops and our Creating a Bully-Free, Safe, and Supportive Learning Environment Toolkit/Academy workshops like the one we recently conducted in Iowa, and to others throughout our additional work, we can begin to build the “intervention muscles” that we all have within us…and in doing so empower ourselves and others to step-up an intervene in life-and-death situations as well as the situations that seem small at first, but which can lead to much more serious consequences down the road, because as the Intervention Continuum reminds us…there are no innocent bystanders.

     

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  • avatar

    Pictures from Leadership Academy for HS Students!

    posted in IEE & Partners' News at 10:49 am on February 15, 2011 | 0 Permalink | Reply

    On February 12th, IEE hosted an Excellence & Ethics Leadership Academy for high school students.  The topic was “Integrity-in-Action” and the participants worked on identifying core beliefs and values, learning concrete ethical decision-making strategies, and developing skills needed for leading a life of high impact & high integrity.  In addition, they ate a lot of pizza, donuts, and candy and were able to meet and interact with students from other schools and communities!

    Check out the Pictures by clicking here!

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  • avatar

    Attitude+Effort=Improvement (and honest reflection)

    posted in Character Blog, Power2Achieve Community at 9:53 am on February 10, 2011 | 2 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , ,

    Yesterday Rich Parisi and I spent some time at LaFayette Jr. High here in Central New York talking Power2Achieve.

    Before I tell you what happened, here’s a bit of the backstory…

    LaFayette is a relatively small Jr/Sr. high school just outside of Syracuse.  They have a diverse student population and face many of the resource and funding challenges that are (all too) typical of many rural schools across the US.  We’re able to work with LaFayette Jr. High thanks to a generous grant from the Community Foundation of Central New York.  The grant also includes Cathedral Academy at Pompei, an inner-city K-8 Catholic school in Syracuse and Bishop Grimes High School, a suburban Catholic high school that includes many working class families.  Pretty cool mix for one project, right?

    The project entails initial professional development training on a batch of Power2Achieve Tools along with other work depending on the schools needs.  For example, in November I spoke to the faculty at Bishop Grimes about how to use the Power2Achieve Integrity-in-Action Checklist to discuss the issues of cyberbullying & sexting with their students.  (you can read more about that here).  Today Rich Parisi will be at a Cathedral faculty meeting to work more with the teachers, counselors, and aides on using Power2Achieve Tools with students.  Again, pretty cool mix of work within one project.

    So what’s happening at LaFayette?

    In January, the entire Jr. high faculty came to IEE for an afternoon session to learn more about the  P2A Compact-4-Excellence, the P2A Portable Compact-4-Excellence and the P2A Attitude-Effort-Improvement Rubric.

    One of the plans hatched during that session was to have the entire 7th and 8th grade, 94 students total, get together and develop a Jr. High Compact-4-Excellence.  Great idea!  The challenge was who would facilitate it…and that’s when all eyes turned to me.

    So two weeks ago I found myself at LaFayette Jr. High in front of a room full of Jr. high students. (Just before starting, one of the teachers came up to me and said, “I’ll pray for you.” While being in front of 94 middle school students for 3 hours is a somewhat intimidating thought, the students were awesome and we had a great session).

    The students started off by answering a question on index cards:  What do you want out of this (your experience at this school)?  I had volunteers share a few of their answers, then collected the cards.  Later in the day someone at the school typed them up into a list.

    We talked about everything from Google to the Superbowl, but mostly we talked about what kind of school they wanted to have.  The students worked in small groups of 5, in teams of 20, and as an entire group to come up with a Compact-4-Excellence, which the students then signed in Declaration of Independence style.

    Want to see what they wrote?  Here’s a doc that shows how they answered the question that started off the day (it needs a bit more editing, but you’ll get the idea) and then shows the Compact they came up with.  Check it out by clicking here!

    That’s not all though…

    Yesterday we found out that the Jr. high teachers have come up with a system to have students self-evaluate for every subject area using the P2A Attitude-Effort-Improvement (AEI) Rubric!  The students sit down with at least one, usually multiple teachers, talk through a self-evaluation as they plot their current state of performance on the AEI Rubric, then flip their sheet over to identify goals for the semester and steps they need to take to achieve those goals. Another really cool tidbit—the teachers are reporting that the the students are exceptionally open and honest in sharing their reflections on attitude and effort. In other words, teachers are hearing things from Jr. high students like “I know I’m not trying that hard, and I know I can get better.” Turns out that when given the opportunity and a guided way to reflect, students can often point directly to the root cause of their academic challenges, and will follow that up by setting up steps to improve!

    Incredible work by the teachers coming up with this, and such an awesome impact their work is having on entire school community!

    Stay tuned for a blog post coming soon from a LaFayette teacher describing exactly what they’re doing, and the “how” and “why” behind it!

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  • avatar

    Under Pressure: Stress & the modern life.

    posted in Character Blog at 4:40 pm on January 27, 2011 | 3 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: balance, pressure, stress

    In a recent survey of more than 200,000 incoming students, highlighted yesterday in the NY Times, researchers found that college freshman are reporting higher levels of stress than ever before.

    Should this really come as a surprise?

    I came through the public school system just before standardized testing really started to gain momentum.  My parents were wonderful, challenging me to do my best, but never communicating to my brother or I that any particular level of achievement was necessary to attain their love or approval.  And yet I remember from a young age how important I felt that my performance on the Iowa Basics were…a test as it was given then that mattered very little compared to the assessments being given today to assess individual student performance, and in some places the performance of a teacher as well.  I have memories of putting up my Pee Chee folders so no-one could look at my answers, focusing as intensely as I could, and then waiting for months to find out what percentile I landed in…and these memories are from 2nd grade…when I was just 7 years old…and that was nothing compared to the academic pressure today’s students face.

    In my time as an educator I’ve seen elementary school students get physically sick from stress, I’ve seen high school students  inconsolably shake and cry with worry that they wouldn’t pass their high-school exit exam (an image I don’t know that I’ll ever forget), and I’ve seen teachers and parents who have reached the point where they don’t know what else they can do–and just want to know what they are supposed to.

    Like so many elements of our society and culture today, our students are under pressure.  Pressure to perform in school, pressure to look like the people they see on the screen, pressure to say “everything’s fine”, pressure to be the best athlete, performer (even though it uses significant Hollywood flair, the current movie Black Swan brings light to this very frightening issue), or musician, the pressure to get a job when they’re hard to come buy, to choose a college major while simultaneously jobs and careers are rapidly evolving…And this is without even considering the unimaginable strains students shoulder in homes where poverty, substance abuse, or other kinds of abuse and/or neglect are a daily reality.

    pressure.  Pressure.  PRESSURE

    Just last week I saw Matt Davidson speak to a group of 40 young adults on “The illusive pursuit of life purpose balance,” during which it became clear that my peers and I are part of a generation whose understanding of the difference between seeking to improve and seeking to be perfect has somehow been obscured, and that the generation coming behind us are in danger of experiencing this to an even more heightened degree.

    As it is with any great challenge, there is great opportunity here as well, it is not all gloom and doom.  We have a chance to prepare a generation of young people who have the essential skills needed to manage stress, communicate well, serve others, and pursue their passions.  We can learn to put these same skills into practice as adults…in our work, in our communities, and in our homes.

    As we all work to improve our schools, our teachers, our student performance, and our own personal and professional lives…let’s not forget to help each other develop the skills needed to live a “balanced, purposeful, and healthy life,” remembering that in every dictionary on every shelf, each of those words comes before the word “test.”

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  • avatar

    The Goal of True Education

    posted in Character Blog at 9:42 am on January 17, 2011 | 0 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , MLK, true

    “We must remember that intelligence is not enough. Intelligence plus character-that is the goal of true education. The complete education gives one not only power of concentration, but worthy objectives upon which to concentrate. “

    -Martin Luther King Jr.

    Click here to hear an excerpt from Dr. Martin Luther King’s speech “The Drum Major Instinct.”

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  • avatar

    Curb Your Distractability

    posted in Character Blog at 8:48 am on December 13, 2010 | 0 Permalink | Reply

    This morning I read a great quote from Jim Collins:

    “If you have more than three priorities, then you don’t have any.”

    For many of us, this presents a HUGE challenge.  We live in a on-demand world where multitasking is an essential skill.  This isn’t necessarily a bad thing; anyone who has ever made the leap from cell phone to smart phone can likely recall the lightning-bolt moment when you realize you now have email, the ability to review important documents, and a fully functional GPS device all in the palm of your hand.  However the risk in all of this, even for those of us that consider ourselves multitask-wizards, is distraction and curbed productivity.

    Want to “measure your distractibility”?  Check out this interactive feature from New York Times Online (you may need to sign in, registration to NYT-Online is free):

    Test Your Focus

    When you finish the test, you’ll get your results stacked up next to “low multitaksers” and “high multitaskers.” At first glance, I was quite pleased with my results.  I consider myself a high multitasker (and I likely demonstrate that in the best and worst of ways), and I passed the distractibility test with flying colors…

    But you also get this:

    “Researchers at Stanford University found that high multitaskers performed poorly when presented with multiple distractions, meaning they had trouble filtering out irrelevant information. Low multitaskers were not affected by the distractions and could hold more items in their short-term memory.”

    Uh oh.  That means those of us who multitask the most are also most prone to distraction.  So why did I beat the odds?

    Probably because of the intentional moves I made to stop curb my distractability:   I was alone in a quiet office before dawn (click here to read quotes from well-known early risers, something I am not, but aspire to be…maybe), had already created my 3Board today based on the quote from Collins (3 priorities on the board, directly above my primary workspace, nothing gets added until something gets checked off), and turned off my Blackberry (something I typically only do when the cabin doors have closed). Of course as you can see from the picture, writing a blog post was not on my 3Board :)   Better get started.

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    Respond to this post by clicking the “reply” link to the right of the title, or by clicking here.

    What’s on your 3Board right now?

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    (Startup Quote! and Daily Routines are both awesome sources for interesting quotes and tidbits of information. Definitely follow-worthy.)

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  • avatar

    "Thinking As Doing"

    posted in Character Blog at 4:09 pm on November 29, 2010 | 0 Permalink | Reply

    Last week I read Matthew B. Crawford’s book Shop Class as Soulcraft:  An Inquiry into the Value of Work.   I had been tipped off that the book was a good one by Maria Popova of Brain Pickings, and I indeed found it to be an enjoyable and applicable read.

    Don’t make the mistake of assuming that Crawford is only rewriting Pirsig’s  Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance:  An Inquiry into Values in order to place it in the non-fiction section.  Although Crawford does at one point refer directly to a passage from the philosophy-by-way-of-open-road classic and other philosophical references are shared, he also clearly rides in his own unique style as he lays out insights gathered and developed through wide ranging experiences beginning as a commune-living teenage electrician, on to a PhD and serving as the director of a prominent think-tank, to now running his own motorcycle repair shop (and note that I didn’t say just owning it; he actually fixes the motorcycles himself), and a number of other stops in between.

    Now I can’t fix a car or anything around my apartment to safe my life, and the idea of riding a motorcycle terrifies me, but to say that Crawford’s writings pertained only to particular trades and tasks would be selling him and his book short.  Themes of design, intentionality, education, head-heart-hand connections, environment, creativity, innovation, and more are all powerfully present.

    In the book, Crawford consistently revisits the concept of “Thinking as Doing,” and in the chapter of the same title he writes,

    “If thinking is bound up with action, then the task of getting an adequate grasp on the world, intellectually, depends on your doing stuff in it.”

    How true that is in the education field.  So often we are paralyzed by the stacks of issues we face; the complexity of the challenges before us.  I can remember so many moments when I would look out over a classroom full of students and think, “I’m not sure I can even teach 1, let alone 31!”

    One thing that people who achieve high levels of excellence learn (you know, the people who look at that same group of 31 students that I just mentioned and think to themselves, “I got this.”)…whether they are teachers, administrators, students, parents, coaches, graphic designers, chemists, or CEO’s…is that in order to find out what works, in order to truly achieve and succeed, you’ve got to try stuff!

    In classrooms and other environments as well, this is an often one of the most frantic and haphazard times of year.  With grading periods ending, a big break coming, holiday programs and events, and dropping temperatures, we can find ourselves with odd chunks of time…. Not really enough time to do anything in too much depth, too much time to do nothing at all (come on teachers, I know from experience you can only stretch that video you’re planning on showing the last day…or last few  days…out for so long!), and a whole bunch of nervous energy.

    This is the perfect opportunity to try stuff!

    If you’ve been thinking that creating a rap would be a fun way to help your students remember what you’ve been studying in Math, try it out!  Mr. McGowan at Amityville Memorial HS in New York did!

    Been wanting to try your hand at starting a student-driven blog?  Check out what Mrs. Yollis’ third graders are doing in California!

    Maybe you’ve been wanting to try out a Power2Achieve Foundations lesson, but just haven’t found the time to do so.  There’s no better time than now to give it a shot!

    It’s the same outside of the classroom as well.  Here at IEE, even amidst the crush of deadlines, trainings, and travel, we’re setting aside blocks of time to develop and discuss prototypes in order to set course for what 2011 will bring.  Books, regional conferences, video projects…All of them?  Some?  None?  We’ll never know until we try.

    So challenge yourself to put some of the thinking you’ve been doing this year into action over the next three weeks by trying something new.  Sometimes the things you try will work beautifully, sometimes they’ll go terribly, and most often they’ll be somewhere in between.

    Without doing, you’ll never be able to rethink, Rework, and develop real strategies & solutions for the challenges you face.  And if things don’t go quite the way you wished they would have on your first try, remember that the truly great ones know that failure can fuel the fire that lights the path to progress and achievement.

    (And if along the way you’re looking for a great read, check out Shop Class As Soul Craft.  Really good stuff.)

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  • avatar

    P2A Character Touchstones developed on student-parent retreat

    posted in Character Blog, Intentional Family Culture at 12:06 pm on November 23, 2010 | 0 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , retreat, touchstone

    Last week I traveled to San Antonio, Texas to facilitate the St. Paul Catholic School 8th grade retreat.

    This retreat is unique because it’s not only for students…but also for their parents as well!  When I first heard four years ago that St. Paul held an annual student-parent retreat, my first thought was “Yeah, right. Getting parents, schools, and students all on the same page anywhere is next to impossible.  In an urban setting and with the real challenges life presents to the modern family, there is no way the school can expect even a fraction of parents to attend.”

    The first St. Paul 8th grade retreat I worked was in 2008…every student but 1 had at least one parent accompany them, and the majority came with both.  I remember a powerful moment at the ’08 retreat when a student’s parents told me that following an activity in which students were affirmed by their classmates, they were on a walk with their daughter when she broke down in tears.  They asked her what was wrong, encouraging her by recalling all the ways her classmates had affirmed her.  It was then that she told her parents she did not feel that she would be able to affirm them in the same way, and that she was trying her best to “be good,” but she and her younger siblings needed them to demonstrate greater family leadership.  The parents told me that this caught them completely off guard, but as the two of them discussed their daughter’s statement, they realized that in fact the character and values they were telling their children to abide by did not align with the ways they were living their own adult lives, and they vowed that they would begin working to make a change.  They cited the retreat as being “the moment that saved our family.”

    This retreat was just as profound for me as a facilitator, and I expect the same is true for the students and families.  (It was particularly special for me because I taught these very same students in 5th grade!)  Every student had at least one parent attend, again with many students having both parents present.  I was personally struck by one family, the parents having divorced many years ago, yet both were on the retreat, a sign of love & support for their daughter.  My parents first separated and later divorced when I was in second grade, and it was not until the post-season football banquet my senior year of college that they would both again sit with me at the same table, an experience that I’ll never forget and that I believe has led to personal and familial healing.  But then again, I don’t remember us ever having the opportunity to attend a school-sponsored parent-student retreat together either.

    This year, one activity students and parents really enjoyed was the development of a Power2Achieve Personal Character Touchstone.  Using the a lesson plan, slides, and student materials from Power2Achieve Foundations Unit 5.1:  Stand Up to Peer Pressure , each student developed their own personal character touchstone.

    A P2A Character Touchstone:

    • Is a statement of the way you want to live.
    • Guides daily decision-making.
    • Reminds us to put moral and performance character into action toward our desired goals.

    Within the lesson, we refer to Daniel Pink’s book Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us (a book that should be required reading for every educator), where on page 154 he challenges the reader to answer the question “What’s your sentence?” Mr. Pink recently issued the same challenge online.

    I could go on and on about the powerful potential of retreat experiences in both public and private schools, the importance of setting up a personal character touchstone, the need to create opportunities for parents and their children to get away from the everyday grind in order to have discussions that have greater depth.  I could describe to you what it looked like when students presented their touchstones to their parents and explained why they had written it the way they had.  I could cite research that explains why this kind of character development can and does improve academic achievement, motivation, school safety, and graduation rates….

    Or, I could just show you what real 8th grade students, when given an opportunity and a process, said about who they are, and who they aspire to become…

    Click here to see the Power2Achieve Character Touchstones that the Class of 2011 at St. Paul School in San Antonio, Texas developed last week.

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